I have always liked to savor my food and take the perfect last bite of food. Weird, I know, but I would often save that last yummy bite of pie or juicy slice of peach for the very last. Well over the years, I found that I would over eat because I was overly full by the time that I got to the last bit of food and definitely by the last bite.
I was always told to do the homework or work that I liked the least first to “get it over with” You know, complete the homework in the the subject that I didn’t like or struggled with, and then I could focus on what I liked. Do my chores around the house then I could relax. What I found over the years is that I didn’t then relax. Instead I watched mindless tv or was exhausted. So instead of enjoying my math home, in my case, I just wanted to get everything done because now it was ALL a chore. When I have housework to do, I would clean or organize, but then when I wanted to write or be creative, I would “poop out”
I started reading these Miracle Morning Books. One in particular, Miracle Mornings for Parents and Families by Lindsay and Mike McCarthy and Hal Elrod basically states to get up and have some time to yourself to mediate, write, exercise and plan out your goals. The Book doesn’t say to mop, scrub toilets, balance your checkbook,make a doctor’s appointment first thing. And all of these things that sound like they would take forever, can be done in 5-10 when necessary so you can get into the right mindset everyday. One day, I exercised and wrote first thing. Then when my husband said that we had to do some mundane thing around the house because it was some special trash pickup it was actually relaxing and kind of enjoyable. My daughter told me that she eats what she doesn’t like last, since she wants to enjoy the good things.
I have started doing the “fun stuff” because it energizes me. It makes me more relaxed and creative for the rest of the day. I don’t resent anyone because I’m doing something boring. I’m happy right where I am. It’s hard to reprogram myself to do this because sometimes I get caught up in that trap where I accidentally look at my phone because I get an urgent text and then it is downhill from there. I check on this that and the other thing and before you know it, I haven’t been productive and it has taken me double or triple the time to get my to-do list done. It’s like I’m in mud and trying to walk with labored steps.
So tomorrow when you wake up, have your dessert first. (ok maybe not really but sure if you find a really good french pastry well then who can blame you. Do the fun work and literally have your dessert before anything else). By doing this I’m in a better mood and I actually have more confidence because I feel like I can accomplish anything once I get these fun, creative things going. Also that weird phone call that I have to make (and hate by the way) isn’t so bad anymore because I’m in such a good mood from my creative endeavors.
In preschool (how I remember something from when I was 4 I’ll never know but I remember it very clearly when I’m faced with a challenger), we were given a picture with a lady dressed in an elegant dress to color. I colored her dress purple, of course, my favorite color. Then I did something that no other kid did. I colored her arms purple, but just up to the elbows. My lady in my picture was wearing long gloves in my story, in my head.
Just then I was interrupted from my daydream of this elegant being by a fellow classmate.
He said “you can’t do that. You can’t color her arms purple”
I said “But they are gloves.” I stopped for a minute. The teacher came over and again reiterated to the boy that I could color my picture however I wanted to.
It starts as early as preschool/kindergarten. We are told that we can’t change and color outside of the lines of the prescribed lesson plan, the coloring book pictures, the job description, the life our family has decided for us.
A lot of times we waste time thinking we actually can’t do something. In high school, I wanted to be part of student council for some reason. I can’t even remember why now but I loved to be involved and be part of everything. So when my classmates basically told me “You can’t do that” because they didn’t vote me in, I decided to use my talents and go the route that allowed me to get where I wanted to go. There was this special position called “Student School Board Representative” I had to attend school board meetings every month and report back to the student council on what was going on as well as give updates to the school board on the goings on of the high schoolers. For this position, I needed to interview and be selected by upperclassmen and faculty. I got in!! It was more work, than the run of the mill student council member, but I wanted this position so badly, I didn’t care. When I had the position, the school board decided that they were going to start charging the students to park at school. Basically, I had to report back to the students that they would be charged like $50 per year just to drive to school. Most people would just accept their fate, but I wasn’t ready to back down just yet. That $50 doesn’t sound like a TON of money but for a high school student in a public school in the 90’s who may be paying for gas, insurance and whatever else for the car to drive it to school so that they can play sports or go to a job after school, $50 is a lot. They were telling us that we could no longer drive to school and park for free. Basically, “You can’t do the things you were doing last week” So I thought “Hmm how can I maintain our free parking” I decided to put together a survey of why each student drove to school and present my findings and my case to the school board. I even had my mom print out the pie charts in color at work. (Hey this was the 90’s, color printouts were a very big thing.) But it worked. They decided to stop the pay for parking initiative and to go back to the way it was. I was determined to make sure that I took my position seriously and even though we were 16 or 17 years olds, we weren’t going to be told that we couldn’t park at our school for free when there was plenty of space and plenty of reasons that students couldn’t pay the fee. When someone tells you “You can’t do that.” Think twice, heck think three times about why they are saying this and how you can prove that yes “I can do this.”
Go out and color your picture of your life however you want to.
You can’t do that
Oh but I can …. and I will